The Dark Pictures Anthology: The Devil in Me Review (Northern Grace)
HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE!
Great graphics? Characters yes, world textures? 50-50. Most of the textures like in many cutscenes are so bad you might think the GPU driver crashed and the textures didn't load properly... it's that bad.
Great dialogue? NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! This is like a B- horror movie with a minimum budget where every character exists in their own world, no reactions to environments, no reactions to their friends being dead or alive, no reaction to the situations, no sense of danger.... for example being chased then a lull walking simulator in between then the characters just start talking casually like their on a country trail hanging out. Character dies then a scene later it's like nothing happened at all. WTF!!! (only one exception is ERIN. She starts off annoying and cringy but her dialogue later and to end-game is spot on and the voice actress is AMAZING! She fits every emotion right in perfectly and never says anything that makes you want to refund this BS) but SPOILER: When Erin survives but Kate died and you meet up with Mark you clearly tell him she died, it was a sad moment... then in the next scene when Jamie got there and they are running for their lives for NO REASON AT ALL Mark asks Jamie where Kate is?! WHILE THEIR RUNNING FROM THE KILLER AND HE ALREADY KNOWS KATE DIED!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU WRITERS!
Great storyline? f*** NO! What an absolute joke of a story that makes 0 sense. SPOILER: Erin later found out that the KILLER doesn't speak and that is a childhood thing that is a real factor to why he is a KILLER... BUT THIS GUY WAS AN FBI SPECIAL AGENT! HE COULDN'T HAVE NOT TALKED FOR HIS WHOLE CAREER! SUCH DUMB BS! Where does this guy get all his cash from? Why would the police not investigate the missing crew who built the whole mansion? Why would the property be owned legally enough to have contractors build on it but not known enough for the lighthouse to LEGALLY be on all the time? Why would the lighthouse be off then? Why would turning on the lighthouse bring in the police? It's so stupidly written, it's so stupidly thought out, it was a mix of every cliche in the most horrible b-grade horror movies. What a scam.
Replay value? NOPE! Why? Because the designers are so f**king clueless that they added "premonitions" which are literally the death scenes of characters before it happens. SPOILER: 'You literally see the death of Kate in the very first tutorial section in the opening!' Why are you so stupid devs? Use the Oblets as a method to BUY scenes in the curator area later after your playthrough if someone wants to skip playing again but don't ruin it for people who ENJOY trial and error playthroughs in a supposed KARMA DECISION BASED GAME!
Controls? f***YOU DEVS! Charlies head and light source moves left and right sporadically and never straight where you want it to be. The walking speed is too painfully slow and the running speed is too stupidly bouncy and quick it ruins the suspense. The scene entries (like entering a new area where the screen fades out and in again) has this stupid lock where for a brief few seconds your character is STUCK and you have to touch the left joystick for the character to move forward 2 steps which is an animation, not free movement, which should be automatic. It makes it feel clunky and unfinished. The symbol for RIGHT TRIGGER on controllers is shaped like the LEFT TRIGGER which is f**king stupid. There is no tutorial or prompt on when you need to HOLD RIGHT TRIGGER to view an object vs just pressing it once so most times your character just picks something up and drops it stupidly. Most people probably picked up a book in-game and never knew to press RIGHT TRIGGER AGAIN because there was no prompt to open the book that way! The characters with light sources always turn them off when you pick up an object or readable clue which forces you to read the text version on the side WHICH IS A SUSPENSE RUINER FOR PEOPLE WHO WOULD RATHER LOOK AT THE INGAME MODELS! Point the flashlight at the book and let me read it, give me an option to turn off the annoying text box, I'm not blind, you just made it blind by taking away the light source probably because your textures are mostly all crap.. ETC ETC ETC
Great gameplay? HARDLY. Most of this game is a walking simulator to give you the sense of doing something when there is literally NOTHING TO DO, no objectives most of the time, no collectables to find, no secrets, no alternative paths, no character development options, nothing. There are pre-scripted locations where those things happen and the rest of the game is just walk from A to B and listen to some emotionless, no panic, casual talk. OH BTW, KILLERS WALKING IS FASTER THEN RUNNING AND HE SOMEHOW TELEPORTS INFRONT OF YOU, BEHIND YOU, without a sound and without reason. SPOILER: 'yes he has a maze of sliding doors and paths but walking behind a character in their room in the open and disappearing instantly when someone walks in is a prompt that this was a ghost game but it's not, so f*** off loyal defenders.' Having to unlock a door with a key, finding the key and then needing to waste my time using the key from my inventory? That's how you extend gameplay? Prompting me to pickup and item then hovering a hand over it to make me press RIGHT TRIGGER? That's gameplay? F*** YOU! You should've added more collectables or objectives instead of trying to make animations into "gameplay". Mindless stupid devs. Marks camera? Does anyone know why you can't go into camera mode and turn 360 degrees to take a photo? Does anyone know why you can't focus the image? Does anyone know if the camera is actually a usable tool or just a gimmick? Did it take an actual photo you can see later? NO BECAUSE IT IS SO HORRIBLE AND DOESN'T DO ANY OF THAT!! Why don't the characters arm themselves with objects to fight back? Half broken bottle? Mark using his tripod? Erin using the stabber on the bottom of her audio recorder? Take a piece of broken wood? Piece of rebar? ANYTHING?! Nope. They all act like 9 year old kids who can only run and hide or like those teenagers from the Jason movies where nothing can kill Jason but guess what devs... THIS GAMES KILLER IS HUMAN AND NOT INVINCIBLE! Glass to his throat would be enough. 3 people could hold him down he isn't that strong! This is overall such trash. You wanted to make this work? This guy should've been H.H. HOLMES's demon who is invincible. Then it would've made sense. SPOILER EXAMPLE: Jamie throws KILLER off of the roof, he VISUALLY has a backwards leg, backwards arm and a twister neck. The girls somehow teleport down to the ground... and instead of making sure he is dead LIKE WITH JAMIES SCREWDRIVER they walk away and then? KILLER gets up and has no issues.
BTW SPOILERS, no characters take any damage. Burnt in a furnace/suffocate in one? Brush it off, no problem. Thrown off a building? Walks away with no bruises, scratches, or limps... hit in the back with a rebar and should've caused internal bleeding? Walk it off no problem. Fall off a ladder and hit your head? No worries. Crawl through the mud under a tree? Not dirty. Run in the rain? Not wet, no cold breath steam. KILLER can pierce you with blunt objects and get pierced with a blunt boat anchor? HE'S NOT JASON THE UNDEAD! WTF are you doing designers? Boat motors cannot reel a metal chain in and certainly not pull a person in, the pro would jam... but you also showed a trail of blood in the water? But the killer survived in the end? WTF.... the boat hits some rocks and explodes hollywood style? f*** off... it wasn't even funny. And why tf in the very end when everyone is on the boat are they not GANGING UP ON THE KILLER!? So stupid...
MY OPINION: The ONLY thing I enjoyed, and I seriously mean it, was Erin. The whole hallways scene with her headphones and hearing the previous victims was like a game in itself it was that intense and her development as a character was so good. This game is just TWITCH bait. F U