Dokapon Kingdom: Connect Review (Mr. Steal Your Gun)
What is Dokapon Kingdom?
Steam Remote Play is enabled, so only one of you or your friends need to buy it.
Dokapon Kingdom is a fusion of classic JRPG, Mario party, and Monopoly. Rather than mini-games Dokapon focuses in on the sheer chaos and malice you can bring upon your friends by stealing their items, raining fireballs down on them from above, killing them and changing their name to Poopy McButtFace.
The Bad
This is a $50 port of a shovelware PS2 game from 2007.
It's a bad port. Like, no mouse cursor support (just keyboard control for menus), no fullscreen, still runs at a locked 30 fps (not that that matters for a turn-based game).
The online room system doesn't let you browse games currently looking for players. You just enter your search criteria and hope a room exists. In other words, you're never playing with randos (not that you would want to, probably?)
Dokapon is a game in dire need of an instruction manual, and this release doesn't even include the one that came in the box. I'll be fixing it with a Steam Guide.
So, objectively, this should be getting a thumbs down. It's lazy and overpriced.
The Good
Dokapon has a cult following for a reason. If you're in the mood for it, hours can go by in a flash.
Bot support means technically you can play alone, if you're that much of a masochist.
People know Dokapon for it's 20 hour marathon of a story mode, but there's a number of fun options for single-session games that last an hour or two.
The Meh
It's described as "friendship-ending" for a reason. Dokapon Kingdom seriously is a miserable experience sometimes. At least you can vent as a Darkling and ruin everyone else's day, too.
It really can be slow. If you're not up for waiting for your turn as people sit around strategizing, you're gonna hate this.
Dokapon is SWINGY. It's not modern Mario Party swingy where someone will inexplicably win for no good reason, but everything's swingy from attack / defend balance to the severity of random events. Sometimes it'll feel like you're purely at the mercy of RNG, despite how much agency you have.
A knowledgeable player can really ruin things for someone who's never played before.